We're Back!

We're Back! 7 days and 10 pounds ago we left on vaction. We had a great time and I have pictures to show off and stories to tell. However, at the moment, I want to vaction a tiny bit more and finish the book I started last night.... So, I'll be in touch later;)

Reflection

Upon entering my Creative Writing Course, I was an arrogant amateur writer who was in for an eye opener. I initially signed up for the class because I felt confident in my writing and I needed an easy class for the Summer Semester. It didn’t take long before I caught a glimpse of what was really in my future.

I didn’t understand how narrow minded my writing voice had become until my Professor asked me to write a whole new piece for our first Creative Nonfiction assignment, different from the one that I had originally turned in. Her expertise in the field of writing immediately honed in on the fact that I was stuck as a writer. I was writing about the same thing repeatedly, with an occasional difference in the perspective. She forced me to step into a new world of writing and I fought the change.

Gradually, I accepted the newfound knowledge and began experimenting with and applying the new understanding. The results were thrilling, and encouraging. I am now able to explore topics and genre that I have not been able to attempt up to this point.

Unfortunately, my weakness is grammar and the technicalities of writing. This makes me extremely grateful for a high quality spell check on the computer. I believe I will gradually overcome this through trial and error as well. Fiction is also a weakness, simply because I lack experience. However, I have found a sense of contentment as I work on my current fictional piece. This brings me hope.

Overall, this Creative Writing Course has changed me; I have established a stronger, more defined writing voice. I am thrilled to say that I am looking forward to writing with a new set of wings. Thank you very much for the push, Professor!

A Glimpse

The following is a clip from the fictional piece that I am currently working on. I fought against this piece for a long time. However, it won and I am now completely on board and trying to figure out what it wants to say.:) In the end it will be a hauntingly tragic love story.

1887
Sam could hear the agonizing screams from his beloved Sarah from the bedroom window of their little house across the street. The pains seemed to cause her to cry out from the very depths of her soul. When would they end, he vehemently called to the heavens. What is happening? In his minds eye he pictured his dear wife of one year wreathing in pain on the bed they once passionately knew each other within, her long blond hair dripping with the sweat of her brow, her face twisting and filled with pain, stained by the endless stream of tears that had refused to relent since his sudden death in the Mill fire not one month ago.

Sam stood at the woolen mill window, both hands bracing himself as his fingers dug into the frame. How could this be happening? Why could he not command himself to be with her at such a poignant time as this? He wondered if the baby would be a boy or a girl, rage consuming every fiber of his spirit, he would never know his child.

All at once he realized that Sarah’s cries had stopped. -Full Clip-

The Reward and Walking in Sharon Old's Shoes

The Reward and The Exceptionally Perfect Mother are two poems that reflect the "behind the scenes"of my writing world. I am a wife and mother before anything else,(at least I'd like to think so.) I often wish that motherhood came as easy to me as my writing does at times.

Written July, 2009

The Reward

The sun has set
kids tucked in
Time for the paycheck.
Reward for a long day
Putrid diapers, sassy preschooler, busy toddler, piles of homework
Soon it will all fade away into the night
the reward soothing the frazzled soul
Chocolate.

Walking in Sharon Old’s Shoes: Mimicking The Language of the Brag
The Exceptionally Perfect Mother

I have wanted to be an exceptionally perfect mother
I have wanted to use my excellence in the art of patience,
and my soft touch and quick laughter
to achieve something akin to angelic from my child,
the request calmly made,
the immediate response from the requests recipient my amazing mothering skills vibrating throughout our immaculate surroundings.

Not So Fairytale

Not So Fairytale may have been the first fictional story that I have written that is longer then a bedtime story. With this story I focused on character and scene development. I wanted my readers to be able to see in their mind's eye everything that was taking place. I believe I came somewhere close to reaching my goal:)

Written July 10, 2009

Not So Fairytale

As a nanny, you can learn a lot about a family before you begin working for them. When I received the file for the Johnson family from my nanny agent, I knew right away that I wanted to work for them. James and Emma had met while attending the University in Michigan. They married quickly and built their family just as quickly. Within five years of their marriage, they had five children, three girls, Abigail, Anna, and Amelia, and two boys, Joshua and Jaden. From their pictures, the children melted my heart right away. They all had bright golden locks of hair and smiles that came easily to their tiny little faces. -Full Story-

Where Is This Place?

Where Is This Place was the piece that reflects the moment of awakening that I experienced in my Creative Writing Course. I sat down to write and the words flowed onto the paper without struggle. It was as if they were just waiting for me. The joy I felt while writing was refreshing.

Written July 14, 2009

Where is This Place?

Where is the place within my past that echoes an aura of contentment?
Somewhere where there is enough of all that we need
A place with no obligations to be met, or people to please
No dates, no time, no appointments that takes us away
Only us

Where is this place that seems to flow just outside of my minds eye?
Beckoning me to come back and drink from its renewing waters
Laughter and familiar voices blanket the memory
If only I could find the map
Its exact location -Full Poem-

There's Something About Hawaii

There's Something About Hawaii was the first piece of writing that I completed for my Creative Writing Course. As I look back at this piece I notice more weaknesses then strengths. This piece reflects my initial refusal to move out of the comfort zone of writing about two very familiar subjects: My twins and Hawaii. I see some creative voice coming through, but I also know of the battle that I was fighting. I had to decided whether or not I was really taking the course to learn how to write something better and new, or just to write to everyone about the same things I always wrote about, was I really there to be taught? Once I accepted my professors offer to show me a new world, the chambers of my creative mind were opened. This battle was similar to the struggle that I write about in this piece to allow the island of Hawaii to change me.

Written July 2009

There's Something About Hawaii

Upon my arrival in Hawaii, I was an uptight, wandering college student searching for something to feel the void in my heart. And within the two years that I lived on the island of Oahu, I found that something I was looking for in the awe and wonder of Hawaii.

It’s impossible to really experience the full beauty of Hawaii without living there for more than a little while. I lived in a large three-bedroom house with nine other girls. We each shared a room with a few other girls. The best part about the home was the ocean view outside the main window. I personally never lost sight of its majesty. Some of my roommates had grown up in Hawaii and had never been to the mainland (continental U.S.) To them, the ocean view was just part of their genetic makeup. For me, it was like reuniting with a dear friend from another lifetime. -Full Story-

Faith to Accept

Written Summer Semester 2009

Faith to Accept is the first essay that I wrote for my Creative Writing Course. I did not end up using it for the completed assignment. Therefore, it is a raw, un-workshopped piece. This shows where I was as I began my creative writing course. I had established my voice on a few topics, the loss of my twins being one of the most prominent. As I continued through the course, my writing voice began to blossom as I branched out and wrote about other topics and other genres.

Faith to Accept

It is human nature to fight for our cause, to petition all the forces of nature to give us what our heart desires. It was a cold dark night in November that I fought the fight of my life. My child’s life was in the ring.

“Please God”, I plead, while wrapped in the arms of my love, my body heaving with sobs. “We will teach her all about you. We will help her to serve Thee continually. Please let her stay… Please let Leif and I raise her together on this earth… Even if she is sick, it will be okay. We want her, Father. We want her here with us! Please make her whole, Father… Nevertheless, Thy will be done…” Those final words swirled in my mind as I lay there, like lingering smoke from a smoldering flame. Could I really allow him to take her if necessary? I fell asleep with that question unconsciously burned into my soul. -Full Story -

Count Down!

WOW! 5 days since I've posted. That tells ya something. I have been busy! I'm so weary from school tonight. I should finish up the last of my extra credit. But I'm just too worn out! Monday morning I have to be done with my school work, the semester ends on the 24th BUT...

Pretend I'm really enthusiastic and excited (I really am behind this mask of fatigue.) Tuesday Leif and I get to run away to Providence Utah to a Bed & Breakfast for our 6th wedding anniversary. I am SOOO Looking forward to it! We both need a break. Grandma and Grandpa Baron will watch our kids for us (BLESS THEM!!)

On Wednesday we will actually meet up with Leif's family (and our kids) in Brigham City for a Mark Baron family reunion. We'll play at the Canyon Home and go to Lagoon one of the days. It should be a really nice week.

Only 2 more days to go!!

Their Expectations - His Realities

Their Expectation - His Realities is a Comparison and Contrast Essay I wrote for my English 101Course. As the first piece in my portfolio, it gives a glimpse of my budding writing voice. I had never taken a writing course up to this point. It wasn't until my Creative Writing Course that I branched out of my "comfort zone" in my writing. You will note in my later pieces that I have learned to move outside of myself and my personal experiences in my writing to explore the world of writing fiction and poetry, both of which I have found great satisfaction in writing.

Written October 27, 2008

Their Expectations - His Realities

Someone once said, “If you want to make God laugh, just tell him your plans.”
A newly married couple may think they have life all figured out. They’ve found each other after a long and wearisome search – and now it’s time for life to really start. This newlywed couple plans to have a family, a business, and their own home, and all of this will happen in a smooth and timely manner. They daydream and commit their dreams to paper. Little do they know what realities God has in store for them. -Full Story-

Chocolate

I was working on the discussion questions for class tonight just as we had finished laying the kids down. The question that I opened up to work on asked us to write a poem on the spot, this is what I wrote:

The sun has set
Kids tucked in
Time for the paycheck.
Reward for a long day
Putrid diapers, sassy preschooler, busy toddler, piles of homework
Soon it will all fade away into the night
the reward soothing the frazzled soul
Chocolate.

As a teenager, I wrote poetry with the typical rhymes and rhythm. Today. I find freedom more appealing.

What Now?

The semester is coming to a close and I've wondered what I will do when I'm not in school. First, I will deep clean my house. After a few days of scouring, I am looking forward to reading several books. I haven't been able to read for recreation this semester and I really miss it. I will take a detour from reading and writing and I will make a rag rug that I have been wanting to make for months.

Finally, I will find a writing workshop for LDS Writers. My faith and religion (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) plays such an integral part of my life and writing, that I hope to find a place within the LDS writing community to share my work and continue my growth and exploration of finding my writing voice. I really look forward to this new journey.

How I Have Done

In order for my children to read about how I have coped this week, I need to write about it. So, I will.

Dear Children,

Finals week for college is known for it's heavy load. As a young adult, I felt an arrogant pride when I announced that it was my "finals week" in school. As a mother, now the arrogance is a bit more subdued and is replaced by a state of desperation. I am desperately hoping for mercy, and conclusion. Papa is working on his final projects for school as well. At least we're running the last lap together.

This week I've had to be creative with my time. I also had to compromise on a few things and turn in a research paper that I felt was mediocre. However, my professor wrote me personally to compliment my work. That alone was a great success in my book, I have always craved validation.;)

Papa and I have traded off when it comes to mandatory kid duty. He cooks sometimes, I cook the other times, he helps me figure out technicalities on my school work, and I proof-read his work. I took Caleb for shots and he worked on his paper as the Jakob watched a movie. When we're not "on-duty" we're at our computers. We have THREE computers in our little house, THREE! Yes Jakob, you have a computer to your name at 4 years old. What have we done?... Hopefully, we are showing you that we value education, we have, right??!!!

In conclusion, I have to say that I've made it through this week, because I married the most thoughtful, helpful, giving, and kind man in the world. He has helped me carry the load.
Just as we have helped each other through our finals week of school, we will help YOU when you need help with the load. Where there's a will, there's a way! Together!

A Plea for Help!

I needed to get your attention, did it work??:) Really, I do need your help though:)

I have a good friend who is struggling with the overwhelming feeling (that we all know) about housework. She got me thinking.

Take two minutes for me, grab your camera, take it around your house and take three pictures of the reality of your home (good, bad, or ugly!) Don't straighten a thing, just take three pictures and post them on your blog. Put the link to this post on your blog and make a comment on this post to let me know you joined in the fun.

My point in this activity is to accomplish one of two things, one: I will either prove to all of you that I am the failure when it comes to keeping my house clean. Or, two: I will prove that we are all striving for the same goal and none of us are perfect. We are all taking one day at a time, doing the Dang Best we can at THAT MOMENT. As Bob says on the movie What About Bob, "Baby Steps to the bathroom, Baby Steps to the dishes, Baby Steps to the vacuum...;)"

Join me in this moment of unveiling:)

Thirteen Years From Now

I take on this week in preparation for thirteen years from now. Thirteen years from now my son will come to me in a state of panic. He will tell me that there is no way he can reach the goal, no way to meet all of the deadlines, just No Way! And I will say, "Where there's a will, son, there's a way." I will then take him to the bookshelf in the family library that is lined with the books that were once my blogs. I will turn to the year 2009, summer semester, this section will tell him about how I found the will to meet all of my college deadlines. I only pray that it will be a good example. We shall see...

Deadlines:

• Poetry Piece
• Advancement on my Final Piece
• Reading review
• Final Exam (100 points, no small task)
• Research Paper (8 pages)
• No discussion questions up yet, I PRAY they don't appear!!

Afternoon Walk Through The Wildflowers: Cedar Breaks

Leif managed to pry me away from my computer and the house yesterday. I am so glad that he did! We took the afternoon and went up to Cedar Breaks. We had a wonderful time walking along a couple of little trails and experimenting with our camera. It was warm and then chilly with some rain, then warm again. The wild flowers are out and it was beautiful. I remember going to Cedar Breaks with my family and have a great time. Great Memories! I felt so rejuvenated after such a long week!

That evening we went to Leif's brother's house and had a fabulous shish-ka-bob dinner together. We stuffed ourselves! We then filled up even more on delicious smores. We visited until late into the night and still could have stayed longer. It was soo nice to just sit out on their porch and enjoy the peace that surrounds them in their little mountain town.

This first slide show is a show of my favorite pictures from the outing:


This next show is the other 4o Great pictures:)

Leif's Offering Massages in SL: Schedule Now!

We're coming into Salt Lake for a family reunion the weekend of the 24th-27th. We would like to stay longer and visit with family and friends. Leif always regrets not bringing his massage table when we come because he has a lot of people who ask him for a massage. So, this time we want to plan ahead.

If you are interested in a massage sometime within the last week of July, let us know! Leif charges 35$ per 1 hour. He can do the massage in Sandy (at my parent's house.) Or, he can come out to you if it works with the schedule.

The table takes up a lot of space, and the massages take up time and energy. So we'll only be able to follow through with this idea if we get several appointments. So talk to your friends and family and let us know ASAP!

I have tried to keep my mind on one path today. Unfortunately, I have failed. There are too many thoughts, too many things left un-finished. I will not

Today's focus

I am thrilled to say that yesterday I found the chamber door opened. I was able to make good headway with my final piece. It will be a long story, so I have a long way to go. But I really hope it continues to flow.

Today, I will take another road. I have to focus on technical writing and research. Wish me luck!! An interesting side-note: I just looked over the essays that I am supposed to analyze. They all revolve around health and nutrition. This is what my research paper is also about. It will be a health-ful day. Nice not to have to jack knife back and forth between subjects... Time to get started.

Fiction Piece

This week we are focusing on a few things. Story and plot, flashback, and scene and summary, to name a few.

As I was reading the chapter I took notes of things that I wanted to remember as I write this week. I am pondering the idea of starting my fiction piece with a Flashback. We'll see how it goes. I also want to focus on developing the characters in the piece and discovering the plot. I'm not sure if the plot will revolve around the destruction and rebuilding of a marriage, the destruction of a marriage and the karma that comes to the wife who chose to destroy it, or the loss of the nanny's innocent perspective on the world around her. I'll start writing with these floating in mind, and we'll see what comes out.

Fiction Piece

This week we are studying about flashbacks.

Many Directions

At the moment my brain and it's creativity are forced to travel in several directions. I have a fiction piece that I am hoping to complete this week (as it is due on Sunday.) I have the final piece that I have mentioned in previous posts. I have a large research paper in my other class that I am supposed to be putting together day by day, as well as a 2-3 page analytical article due by the end of the week.

Those are my writing obligations. I won't even go into the daily obligations as a mother. Chances are, you already know about that and can relate. The question is, how am I going to accomplish what I need to in my writing? I have 3 more school days in the week. I try to take Saturday off and Sunday for sure. I will take one project per day. On two of those days I have to do three discussion questions as well. Overwhelming? Yes. But I will do my best. That is all I can do. It will all work out.

Okay, let it be written, let it be done!

4th of July Festivities

We had a great 4th of July weekend! My parents, Jared, and Jason&Hannah came to our house to spend a couple days. It was fun to share a small town holiday with them. My dad posted a good description of all that we did and a few more pics on his blog. I feel bad but my blogging time is limited so I can't give a whole bunch of details. The highlights were:

Eating out together without having to wrestle the kids
Choosing fireworks
making smores in our fire pit
Going to the Fireman's breakfast
Watching the parade
Going to Zions
Watching Awesome Fireworks
Visiting!

We had a good time just being together. By the last day Leif and I were SOO Tired! It was strange how tired we were. But we had been going non-stop for a few days. Anyway, Jakob was So thrilled to have everyone here. We all were, but it is a huge treat for Jakob. Here are some pictures.

The Big Story

Today I am bound and determined to get SOMETHING down on paper for my final piece for my Creative Writing course. The subject of my piece will be a creative fiction story that revolves around the ghosts that live within the family-owned Woolen Mill. I have mulled over it for days, to no avail. I talked to family members to try and get some creative juices flowing about the subject. I had hoped for some great insite. At this point, I have received a history of the mill with some tid-bits about ghosts. One thing is for sure though, the mill is haunted, and there could be a fun story about it. The problem is, I am the one who has to come up with the story. Grrr!

I wish so bad that I could open that chamber in my brain that holds all of the great stories. I feel as if it is locked and I am constantly, frantically, searching for the key to open it up. There must be a window open, because I occasionally catch a breeze of inspiration. But that's it, a breeze.

Struggling To Create

Along with our weekly projects in my Creative Writing course we have a Final Project that we're supposed to