Another Long Pause: Answers or Not. Good Things to Come.

Hello everyone, I'm still here. I just find that when life gets to a certain point of stressful, I pull away. So if you notice that it's been a while since I've posted. Or you write me and I take a few days to get back to you, most likely the best thing to do is just send a prayer up for me and wait for me to come around. Or, you can drop by or send me a note. That would work too.

Anyway, I need to make this update quick. I'm going to take on a fear today. I am going to drive a long distance on my own. I feel good about it. But I need to get going. I'm going shopping to the nearest Wal-Mart. About an hour away.

Well, I got the test results for my health. As usual everything was apparently considered in the normal range. I'm still not completely well. But I have learned to just put things aside sometimes and let God take it on. I'm not very good at letting go sometimes. But I try. Gratefully, I have managed to continue to find strength enough to keep things afloat. If I can find it in me to be cheerful during the day, then my boys are able to follow my lead. Otherwise, life is an utter nightmare!

On my bad days I have had a most serious desire and consideration to strap my boys in the van and drive to North Carolina. Believe it or not my boys enjoy trips like this as long as they have a movie, food, water, and their blankets. I think they feel safe in the world while on road trips together (in our new van). They still need space around them But I think it would be amazing to take the trip. But, it's not to be. This has been hard for me. I often feel so alone and anxiety ridden at home. But we might have some light to look towards. One of the rooms in the house Leif lives in is going to be empty for two weeks in July. We are HOPING that the kids and I might be able to stay in it for that time. I can't tell you how wonderful that would be. We're waiting to hear back if it is available. I am praying that it is!!

So that's a short and sweet version of life and the things to come! I hope you're all having a great Summer! We've had many good memories and we look forward to a long holiday weekend with Papa! We love Independence Day!! This year I think we will try to make our first Family Flag as well as celebrating the greatness and beauty of our country. We will also take some time to thank and honor the men and women who serve and sacrifice to keep our country safe and free to choose. I look forward to the weekend!